week forty-nine >> "wait a minute"

   The title of this last weeks spread speaks profound to me... wait a minute!!  I feel like shouting this to the world. Ceci, I left a phone message earlier for you today, speaking my feeling of being underwater for the last couple of weeks.  This is truth.  I was reflecting on this idea while in the shower, noting that, yes, perhaps I'm surviving in this mode because I have underwater breathing apparatus, however, it is not a sustainable mode, thus, re-surfacing with buoys is mandatory - unless i change my species. 
     May we keep this spread up another week again, it is so beautiful, and there are so many nuances to delve into. 
    I can once again look into this page for reflections of my current state of being... for instance, the key to the castle on the left side... Tony and I have been doing weekly drive-bys of potential houses for rent, as we navigate the field of finding a temporary residence while our primary goes under construction... the swirl of stress that is creeping into my psyche on this front is one of the major factors pushing me under the waters surface.  And yet, I have faith that we will manage, it's just that sense of so much to do - and the constant engagement and completion of to-do's.  In the midst of the to-do's which I hold value in, not only in their wholeness, but also in each step being a note in the rhythms of day and week i / we are working to maintain... and then, in the middle, there is the inevitable pause and halt and breakdown when change is called for - as it seems always to be - at least in my relationships - aye caramba. 
  Thank goodness for choir, for dance, for sex, for hugs and kisses, for community, for keys to the castle.
Love you -J.